Lady Norbert (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ladynorbert) wrote2006-04-05 11:05 am
ladynorbert) wrote2006-04-05 11:05 am
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Thanks, gang, for all the hugs and sympathy wishes. It means a lot. Incidentally, since I think one or two of you did wonder, that photo in the last entry was taken at my wedding reception. It's the best one I have of them.
For the most part, I'm okay. I have my bad moments, but that's normal, I should think. The girls were with me when I got the call, so I wasn't alone; they've really been terrific. Pastor believes, and I'm inclined to agree, that it was the will of Our Boss that this would happen while they were here, so I'd have the extra in-person support.
Mostly I'm worried about my grandfather, who seems very lost. My mom, in case I haven't mentioned it lately, is incredible. She's a rock.
I was there in the afternoon, for about an hour. Janie, who used to be my grandparents' tenant, had been visiting a lot and this time she'd brought her digital camera, so she took pictures of Nana with me and with Liza and with Mom and Pop-pop.
Mom was there continuously yesterday until late last night, and she was saying to my grandfather that she didn't want to leave -- she knew it was Nana's time and she was afraid to leave the house. But Ravi was home sick with a high fever, so Pop insisted that she go home for a little while. She tells me she was kneeling on the floor beside the sofa, where Nana was lying, and she looked up to say something to him, "...and that damn cat walked in."
About six years ago, my grandparents had to have their 19-year-old cat Holly put to sleep. They have not had a cat since. While Mom was sitting there, Holly sauntered into the living room; Mom says she had goosebumps on her arms, because she knew why Holly was there.
Well, Mom went home for maybe half an hour to an hour, checked on Ravi, cleaned the house...and then the call came. Pop went over to check on Nana, who had been sleeping, and she was gone. A piece of mercy, to quote Serenity. So Mom and Ravi and Lisa all went over to him, and Mom called Pastor, because she really didn't know what to do. She and Lisa cleaned Nana up and changed her nightdress, and Pastor took care of calling the nurse (for a formal pronouncement) and the funeral home, while Ravi called friends and relatives. Lisa called me, and I called Kevin at work to let him know, then I went up myself -- not before Clez and Thoz gave me massive hugs, though. They elected to stay at home, not wanting to get in the way, but sent their condolences. Most likely they'll attend the viewing with me, but I'm not going to ask them to go to the funeral; if they want to come, of course, I won't object, but I wouldn't blame them for wanting to miss it. Pop insisted I go home after about an hour, because he didn't want me leaving them there alone. He feels badly, as do I, that this sort of interferes with their enjoyment of their visit, but they keep reassuring me that it's fine.
Last weekend, when she bullied her way home from the hospital, Nana very calmly informed everyone that she was going to die on Wednesday. And she did.
I'm really tired...I think I slept for maybe three hours.
The funeral is probably Saturday. I expect I'll get more details on that after I go home. Pastor said I really don't have to be here -- church employees are entitled to three days off for the death of a close relative -- but with Easter coming and everything, there's just too much to do. Besides, as Sherlock says, work is the best antidote for sorrow.
For the most part, I'm okay. I have my bad moments, but that's normal, I should think. The girls were with me when I got the call, so I wasn't alone; they've really been terrific. Pastor believes, and I'm inclined to agree, that it was the will of Our Boss that this would happen while they were here, so I'd have the extra in-person support.
Mostly I'm worried about my grandfather, who seems very lost. My mom, in case I haven't mentioned it lately, is incredible. She's a rock.
I was there in the afternoon, for about an hour. Janie, who used to be my grandparents' tenant, had been visiting a lot and this time she'd brought her digital camera, so she took pictures of Nana with me and with Liza and with Mom and Pop-pop.
Mom was there continuously yesterday until late last night, and she was saying to my grandfather that she didn't want to leave -- she knew it was Nana's time and she was afraid to leave the house. But Ravi was home sick with a high fever, so Pop insisted that she go home for a little while. She tells me she was kneeling on the floor beside the sofa, where Nana was lying, and she looked up to say something to him, "...and that damn cat walked in."
About six years ago, my grandparents had to have their 19-year-old cat Holly put to sleep. They have not had a cat since. While Mom was sitting there, Holly sauntered into the living room; Mom says she had goosebumps on her arms, because she knew why Holly was there.
Well, Mom went home for maybe half an hour to an hour, checked on Ravi, cleaned the house...and then the call came. Pop went over to check on Nana, who had been sleeping, and she was gone. A piece of mercy, to quote Serenity. So Mom and Ravi and Lisa all went over to him, and Mom called Pastor, because she really didn't know what to do. She and Lisa cleaned Nana up and changed her nightdress, and Pastor took care of calling the nurse (for a formal pronouncement) and the funeral home, while Ravi called friends and relatives. Lisa called me, and I called Kevin at work to let him know, then I went up myself -- not before Clez and Thoz gave me massive hugs, though. They elected to stay at home, not wanting to get in the way, but sent their condolences. Most likely they'll attend the viewing with me, but I'm not going to ask them to go to the funeral; if they want to come, of course, I won't object, but I wouldn't blame them for wanting to miss it. Pop insisted I go home after about an hour, because he didn't want me leaving them there alone. He feels badly, as do I, that this sort of interferes with their enjoyment of their visit, but they keep reassuring me that it's fine.
Last weekend, when she bullied her way home from the hospital, Nana very calmly informed everyone that she was going to die on Wednesday. And she did.
I'm really tired...I think I slept for maybe three hours.
The funeral is probably Saturday. I expect I'll get more details on that after I go home. Pastor said I really don't have to be here -- church employees are entitled to three days off for the death of a close relative -- but with Easter coming and everything, there's just too much to do. Besides, as Sherlock says, work is the best antidote for sorrow.