The Many Daughters of Allan Quatermain

[ladynorbert]

Being the creator of one, I wanted to see just how many random daughters old Allan has added to the population of Fanfiction.net. From what I've found, there are six total, including my own. Yes, I'm reporting myself along with everyone else. All spellings and stuff are the work of the original fan authors and I accept no blame.

I'm using the same spork form used at deleterius and marysues, both of which I belong to under my other LJ name. They are listed in no particular order, except that mine is last. Three take place during the events of the film; the other three take place after the film. Three spell the name correctly (Quatermain), and three don't (Quartermain). I'm not reporting them officially, although I have reported two of them in the past, because this is my LJ and not the communities; moreover, I like some of them. Whether any or all of them are Mary Sues is up to the discretion of the readers; if anyone wants to report any of those which I've not already reported -- I note which two those are -- feel free.

*~*

I think this first story is the most Mary Sue of them all, if only for the character's name. See if you agree.

Story Or Series Title: Harper of My Heart
Fandom: LXG
Culprit Author's Name: Serena11
Summary: The LXG are accompanied by Jessie, Alan's precocious, psychic, 7-year-old daughter. Finished. Warning: slight Mary-Sue. (At least she admits it.) Jessie sounds so mature because she's a god.

Full Name (plus titles if any): Jesshiquekah Shaellanderial Kalika Quartermain, nicknamed Jessie...according to Nemo, "Kalika" means "daughter of Kali" (which is possible) and her mother was from India (which is improbable)
Full Species(es): Allan's daughter #1
Hair Color (include adjectives): Color not given, but "tied in a braid with fourteen feathers -- he knew it was exactly fourteen"
Eye Color (include adjectives): Initially described as "violet with melted stars" but later as "big blue eyes"
Unusual Markings/Colorations: If she has any, they're mentioned in later chapters; I couldn't bring myself to go beyond the first chapter.
Special Possessions (if any): "The gothic box harp, as tall as two revolvers placed end to end, and just as wide, with it’s intricate carved designs and bronze strings, was one of the pride and joys of Jessie Quartermain’s life. Her mother had carved the fore pillar with an intricate design of Celtic knots, three different designs all interwoven into one. The top beam was carved with interlaced crescent moons, flaming suns, rayed stars. The other pillar had a name and title engraved in it in gothic letters: Harper Jesshiquekah. The harp was white as the snow, silver birch wood, but every carving was stained with its own color, the suns a burnished gold, the moons and stars silver, the knot works violet, blue, and indigo."

Annoying Origin: The reproductive product of Quatermain and a woman from India, allegedly.
Annoying Special Abilities: Plays a Gothic box harp, the only source of strength in her father's life. *puke* Reads minds. Can see Skinner. Is a GOD.
Other Annoying Traits: Can turn rough-and-ready Allan Quatermain into someone called "Alan Quartermain" (isn't that a character on General Hospital?), who addresses her by such spork-worthy endearments as "Harper girl, my Harper girl, love of my lonely heart."

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: Good grief, I'm not sure where to start. Here's where she meets Skinner.

“No games, M.” Alan said. The younger British man smiled, murmuring, “Skinner, you have an avid audience.” Jessie’s big blue eyes were shining with delight, awe, amazement, reverence, you name it, it was probably there.

"Oh, indeed? What a lovely girl. Hello."

"Hi. Are you invisible?"

"Yes."

"Oh. You’re naked. Aren’t you cold?" The invisible man laughed.

“Actually, I’m feeling a slight breeze ‘round my nether regions, and I must admit, it’s quite refreshing.” Jessie giggled. “Rodney Skinner’s the name, Miss Bright Eyes, gentleman thief and invisible man! And you are?”

“Alan Quartermain, sharp shooter, ex-rifleman in Her Majesty’s army. This is my daughter.” Alan said waspishly.

“Jesshiquekah Quartermain, harper, sometimes invisible girl, siren, and banshee at your service.” She slid down, smiled in Rodney’s direction. “I can see you, you know.”

“You can see me?”

“I can smell you, hear you, feel you, and sense you looking at me.”

*~*

This next one I've actually reported in marysues, and it's very much unfinished. To be fair, the person (people?) behind this can actually write. The chief problem with this story, apart from the two Mary Sues running amok, is the overwhelming purple prose. Also, I do want to apologize to my dear friend sethoz, who is listed as a beta reader, for having reported something she apparently read. *huggles Thozy*


Story Or Series Title: Gunslinger
Fandom: LXG
Culprit Author's Name: Three Spoil'd Angelz
Summary: Jade Quatermain, a witch, and Myrrh, a mystery unlocked by only one key, are out for vengeance... and intent on destroying the League. And they can see Rodney...


Full Name (plus titles if any): Jade Quatermain
Full Species(es): Allan's daughter #2
Hair Color (include adjectives): "Her hair was soft and dark, the deep rich color of the soil."
Eye Color (include adjectives): "Her eyes were almond-shaped and the light grey of the fading night. They darkened with her anger like the storm. They were framed with thick dark lashes."
Unusual Markings/Colorations: "Her skin was like smooth butter, or like creamy satin. Her lush lips were of a blood red color, and her teeth were whiter than the snow. Indeed she was a beautiful woman, curved and with the desired figure, but she was cold like the winter night, or like an early spring morning still clinging to the frost." Way to rip off Eowyn at the end there.
Special Possessions (if any): An Arabian destrier stallion and a falcon.

Annoying Special Abilities: According to the summary, she can see Skinner, but the story stops at the second chapter so there's nothing to back it up. Can see Hyde in Jekyll's reflection in a mirror. Can communicate telepathically with her companion and co-Sue, Myrrh.
Other Annoying Traits: Blames the League for her father's death (though he comes back to life in about the fourth paragraph) and is out to destroy them.

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: Here is the part where we first "see" the character called Myrrh:

She yawned, smiling like a wolf. Her nails were painted with some kind of lacquer that was blood red and shiny. Her eyes were colored the deep yellow-green of limes, like the color of the small peridot on her gold ring. Black glossy hair like the unknown regions of the obsidian-hued sea in a storm flowed downward in a thick river to the middle of her back.

"Myrrh," she whispered, her swirling ocean eyes glittering. "My name is Myrrh."

"Myrrh is mine, its bitter perfume…" the moon sang eerily, like the haunting but melodic call of the winged nocturnal hunter called the owl.

"Breathes a life of gathering gloom…" the wind chorused. It too was supernatural and beautiful.

"Sorrowing, sighing, bleeding, dying…" the creaking trees crooned, their haunting harmony sending shivers down her spine.

"Sealed in the stone cold tomb…" she finished, her spectral voice sending shivers down a stray dog's spine. "My name is Myrrh…"

*~*

This one I've also reported at marysues, and when I first found it, I was hopping mad. (My friends know why.) The author seems to have taken some of her blistering reviews to heart, and made several changes to the original story. It definitely is an improvement, I'll say that much. So far only one chapter is up, and it hasn't been updated since last August.


Story Or Series Title: Love never Dies
Fandom: LXG
Culprit Author's Name: AlanRickmanLuvr13
Summary: Alan Quartermain has a rather unusual daughter according to the standards of woman in the 19th century. When they are called to help the league she falls in love with non other than Henry Jekyll. Fallow them on their quest to find happiness and adventure. Again with the Alan Quartermain spelling. And what does she mean, "fallow them"? Leave them unplanted for a few years?

Full Name (plus titles if any): Initially, it was Elizabeth-Marie Quartermain, nicknamed Marie; the author has changed the story to make it Lucia Anita Quartermain, nicknamed Lucy.
Full Species(es): Allan's daughter #3
Hair Color (include adjectives): not given, but curly
Eye Color (include adjectives): not given
Unusual Markings/Colorations: not given
Special Possessions (if any): A journal. *twitches a bit*

Annoying Origin: In the first version, she lived in Kenya with her father. Now she's an American Secret Service agent, just like her best friend Tom Sawyer! And yet she's still Allan's offspring.
Annoying Special Abilities: None mentioned yet, which is an improvement over the original, in which she was a martial arts master and an expert fencer.
Other Annoying Traits: Sings the "Yo-ho, yo-ho, a pirate's life for me" song.

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: At least this time the author seems to have learned to use a spellchecker, and to not have her character travel through time using a device ripped off from another fandom.

Lucy was never one who likes dressing in nice dresses or fixing her hair. She would usually tie her hair a string and wear trousers and a mans shirt. It was a lot comfier and it helped her move. The only times that she wore dresses was when her mother had forced her or when she went out with her father. But Lucy knew that going into London as a young lady, wearing men’s clothes would only place her in a bad situation. So a few days earlier she had bought the dresses she liked the best. They weren’t too flashy, nor to conservative, but just the way she liked them. She also liked dark colors so almost all the dresses were colors like dark green, Grey, or black. Some were even red and gold which she found she rather liked the combination.

Lucy looked through her closet, picking out a dress to wear. And hour and a half later she finally settled with a simple dark green dress that needed no corset. She would wear black shoes, and her hair would be but up in a simple sloppy bun, letting her curls cascade down. To say the least, she looked rather nice. For the next two days she dressed up even though she was just on a ship, she had to get used to walking around in a dress and heels and what better place than a ship?

*~*

I have to admit, I never saw or read this one until I started hunting for Quatermain daughters. It's quite good, and would be even better if the author finished it; the second (and currently last) chapter was added last April.

Story Or Series Title: Papa, May I?
Fandom: LXG
Culprit Author's Name: Kelekona8
Summary: For the light heartedness of the title, this isn't a very light hearted fic. It is about what I think would have happened if Quartermain had a daughter.

Full Name (plus titles if any): Carolyn Quartermain, sometimes called Carrie
Full Species(es): Allan's daughter #4
Hair Color (include adjectives): blond and curly
Eye Color (include adjectives): not given
Unusual Markings/Colorations: none mentioned
Special Possessions (if any): A necklace belonging to her late mother, made of colorful stones and a silver pendant. Also, when traveling from Kenya to England, she disguises herself by wearing her late brother's clothes.

Annoying Origin: Kenya, with her father
Annoying Special Abilities: Fluent in both French and Swahili. At this point, that's the only ability stated.
Other Annoying Traits: I really didn't find much of anything about her that annoyed me, personally. She's 17 years old and coming across as pretty mature.

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: It's hard to pick the "worst," since I do rather like this, but here's an excerpt.

She didn’t move until she was jerked out of it by a huge explosion, to which her reaction was to drop her basket, crouch down and cover her head with her arms. She looked up and saw the hotel ablaze; her mouth fell open. She rose to her feet and looked back to where the two men were. She ran over to the well known figure, the basket forgotten. “Papa!”

He looked up and extended his arm to her, which wrapped around her shoulders; her own arms went around his chest.

“It appears the war has arrived.”

Carolyn gave the man a look of confusion. She looked up at her father, Allan Quartermain, who glanced back down at her. He pressed his lips together; Carolyn recognized that look, it meant that he had come to a decision about something very difficult. Her father then looked back at the burning building. “Very well, Reed. I’m in.”

Carolyn looked at her father questioningly.

“Excellent,” the man, whom her father had called Reed, said. “Pack for an English summer.”

Carolyn’s jaw dropped as her gaze switched back from Reed, who was now walking off, to her father. “*English*? Papa, what’s going on?”

She watched as her father’s face became tight and she followed his gaze as it went to the graveyard, or more specifically to a particular grave in the graveyard. A cross, that had Quartermain simply written across it. She felt a pang in her heart at the sight of that grave. She looked back at her father. “Papa?”

He didn’t look at her. “Let’s go, Carolyn.” She stiffened when he called her by her full name; he only did that when something was wrong. “I will explain everything when we get home.”

*~*

Of all the Allan's daughters stories I've found (apart from mine, which I can't judge fairly), I thought that last one and this one showed the most promise. Like the one with Carolyn, it's unfinished. Was beta read by my good pal clez.

Story Or Series Title: Bloodlines
Fandom: LXG
Culprit Author's Name: LotRSeer3350
Summary: A new player emerges and pleads for the League's help. But who is this mysterious young woman, and what is her connection to the League's former leader?

Full Name (plus titles if any): Abigail Quatermain
Full Species(es): Allan's daughter #5
Hair Color (include adjectives): not given
Eye Color (include adjectives): not given
Unusual Markings/Colorations: none mentioned
Special Possessions (if any): none that I saw

Annoying Origin: Used to live in Kenya with Allan, but was sent back to England to live with Jonathan and Elizabeth (whoever they are; it's never explained) three years prior to the events of the film.
Annoying Special Abilities: none mentioned
Other Annoying Traits: If it can be called annoying, she's trying to find the other League members so she can find out what happened to her father.

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: Umm...let's see...

“Adrian,” Abigail said without looking behind her. The older man smiled.

“I’ve always hated when you do that,” he answered. Abigail stood and turned to face him, a smile playing on her lips as well. His response was part of an old joke that had been going on between them for years.

“It’s not as though I can help it,” she responded. Then she took on a more serious note. “Tell me you have good news.”

Adrian Turner looked away from his charge, exhaling heavily. Then he straightened, his stance reminiscent of something military, and began to report his findings.

“I have been unable to locate Nemo or the Nautilus. They have been changing ports frequently and seemingly at random. We have not been able to track them.” Abigail sighed heavily and looked away, turning to face the fireplace.

“However,” Adrian started, causing Abigail to turn back in a rush. “Agent Sawyer has returned to America. He is currently in Washington awaiting his next mission.”

Abigail raised her eyebrows and cocked a grin. “America?”

Adrian returned her smile with one of his own. “So it would seem.”

Abigail grabbed the half-glass of sherry that had been sitting on the end table and finished it off in one gulp. She played with the empty glass in her hands and turned back to her mentor.
“I’ve always wanted to go to America.”

*~*

And this last one is mine, mostly thrown in for comparison. A lot of people sure do seem to love her, which is gratifying, and I know I'm very fond of her myself. Love her or hate her, there she is in all her Sue-ish glory. ;) (There are presently four stories in the series, so I'm mainly referencing the first one.)

Story Or Series Title: The Private Diary of Elizabeth Quatermain (often called TPDoEQ for short)
Fandom: LXG
Culprit Author's Name: Lady Norbert
Summary: After the events of the film, Allan Quatermain's daughter works with the League to solve a mystery her father left behind. Rated for later chapters.

Full Name (plus titles if any): Elizabeth Grace Quatermain (middle name given in the third installment)
Full Species(es): Allan's daughter #6
Hair Color (include adjectives): I don't think I ever actually mention it, but it's brown
Eye Color (include adjectives): Grey, as I mention briefly in the third story.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: none
Special Possessions (if any): A diary, and a small closet of sorts called an herbarium, in which she keeps the various plants she raises for medicinal and household purposes.

Annoying Origin: Allan's daughter, but grew up in Devonshire in the household of her mother's sister
Annoying Special Abilities: Knows how to shoot that elephant gun, but hates to do it; can turn above-mentioned plants into teas and medicines.
Other Annoying Traits: I'll admit she's a little whiny; in the earlier parts of the series, you can also see how rigid and formal she is. Being in the League helps her to loosen up a bit, but she's still very proper. Also a serious creature of habit. Makes a point of attending church services any time the League puts into port, if possible. (Don't know if that would be considered an annoying trait, but it is definitely part of who she is.)

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: Hrm. Let's see. This is from an early entry in her diary, when she first meets the League, and should give you an idea about what an uptight society girl she is.

When I was in school, I was taught to observe much and say little, so here I will record my observations about my five visitors.

The first to make his name known to me was the legendary Captain Nemo, commander of the Nautilus and onetime terror of the seas. He was dressed in the splendid garments of his native India, though as I have said, all in black. I would put his age near that of my father, to judge by the lines on his bearded face. His manner was extremely formal, with a military crispness, but his tone was warm and sympathetic. I think he and Father probably got on well together.

The lady of the company is Wilhelmina Harker, the celebrated English chemist. We had never been formally introduced, but I know I have seen her before today. She is tall and very graceful, with a soft voice and sharp eyes. Though she was no less cordial than the rest, there is something about her which makes me uneasy. The others call her Mina.

The shy red-haired man was none other than Henry Jekyll, the doctor of renown. I was impressed to meet him, but also very puzzled, for I had heard that he was dead. He has a kindly demeanor, though slightly nervous, and I found myself wondering what purpose he and Mrs. Harker serve in the League of "Extraordinary" Gentlemen.

I have no idea what my next guest looks like, for the man is invisible. Though everything I was ever taught would have me disbelieve it, the fact is that Rodney Skinner is completely transparent. He wore a black suit and black-tinted glasses, and had smeared some form of white cream all over his head in order to be somewhat visible. He is quite irreverent; I honestly believe that if he were introduced to the Queen herself, he would salute her with a merry "Cheers, ducky!" But there is something refreshing and enjoyable about such a cad, so long as nothing disappears from the house during his stay -- he was most open and honest about being, as he said, "a gentleman thief."

The last of my visitors is also the youngest; although I am not precisely certain, I believe we are near the same age. Special agent Thomas Sawyer joined the League shortly after my father did. He hails from the United States, where he is a member of the elite Secret Service. He has a rather uncontrolled mop of blond hair which is always falling in his face, very much unlike the style here in London just now. Agent Sawyer seemed the saddest and most heavily grieved of all the group, which is fitting, since it was while saving his life that my father had taken his mortal wound. He apologized to me personally for that, though I cannot imagine that there is anything requiring forgiveness. I have never met an American before, though I have heard much of their uncouth manners and disregard for propriety. But if all Americans are accurately represented by the one currently under the roof of Solomon Manor, then they must be an amiable breed, for Agent Sawyer is as pleasant as one could wish. He is not so cheeky as Skinner, but neither does he exude the formality of the others.