The Christmas Carol Rant

[ladynorbert]

This is a bit of a tradition for me. Every holiday season, I complain about the Christmas carols I feel should be retired. Generally the same ones from year to year, but here's this year's list.

1. "Sleigh Ride" -- Let's see. First of all, unless you specifically go to a place where such things are offered, nobody goes for sleigh rides anymore (except Santa, of course). I certainly don't know anyone who uses the expression "Yoo hoo," unless they're talking about a chocolate soft drink. The outdated-ness of the song gets on my nerves, but I could overlook that factor if it was fun to listen to. I don't find it to be. I just find it irritating.

2. "It's the Holiday Season" -- I think this is the name of the song, but I'm not positive. Where "Sleigh Ride" merely annoys me, I hate this song with the burning passion of a thousand fiery suns. It gets stuck in my head and bugs the hell out of me for days on end. Plus it's one of those obnoxious songs with nonsense words in it. "So loop-de-loo, and dickory dock, and don't forget to hang up your sock." In other words, they couldn't think of any real words that fit the rhyme scheme and rhythm, so they made shit up. I HATE that. If you're gonna sing a song, make sense.

3. "Jingle Bells" -- Yes. I hate the old JB. Well, hate is a bit strong; it's bouncy and the refrain doesn't bother me. Even the first verse (the one everyone knows) isn't so bad. It's the other verses that get on my nerves, being about as socially relevant as "Sleigh Ride."

4. "Believe" -- Josh Groban, I love your voice. And the lemody vs. melody thing doesn't bother me too much, really. But you are incredibly overplayed by my local radio stations, and so even though Christmas is more than two weeks away, I'm already tired of this song.

5. "Christmas Shoes" -- This song gets turned off the instant I recognize that it's what I'm hearing. I hate, hate, hate this tug-at-your-heartstrings thing about a kid buying new shoes for his dying mother. Is it a beautiful song? Yes. Is it moving and socially relevant? Yes and yes. But it makes me cry, every time (partly because my own mother was on her deathbed a few Christmases ago), and I resent being made to cry while I'm trying to drive.

Comments

[pizzagirl78.livejournal.com]

And I thought I was the only one who hates hearing the "Christmas Shoes" song. My mother's health was deteriorating in December thirteen years ago, and that song just brings up painful memories.

[ladynorbert.livejournal.com]

*nods* For me too.

[wens.livejournal.com]

I much prefer a lot of the religious music a lot more than the secular stuff-- not for religious resons mostly, but because a lot of the secular stuff is just plain cheesy for the reasons you state so eloquently in this post.

I HATE "Sleigh Ride." We had to sing it for choir, and man, I felt embarassed because the lyrics suck reindeer doo-doo.

The only version of "Jingle Bells" that doesn't annoy me goes "Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg..."

[ladynorbert.livejournal.com]

I HATE "Sleigh Ride."

I'm so glad it's not just me. Most people, when I mention hating that song, tell me I'm a grouch and that Christmas is a time for remembering those good old days. Bleah.

[wens.livejournal.com]

I don't think it's just you. I mean, come on: those lyrics are just dorky. "Sleigh Ride" has not aged well.

[melydia.livejournal.com]

I agree that the old JB needs to be retired, but for me it's because I've heard too many grade schoolers singing it at dirge speed. It doesn't help that it's usually the second or third song one learns when picking up a new instrument, giving me flashbacks to middle school band concerts.

Sleigh Ride doesn't bother me, but I'm not about to tell someone their opinion about a song is wrong. (But I also might be more tolerant of such attitudes since my best friend hates everything about Christmas, the music especially.)

I've never heard the other three, though that sounds like a good thing. I've heard several people griping about that Christmas Shoes song in particular.

[megarouge.livejournal.com]

I despise the Christmas shoes song. Radio gets turned off as soon as it starts. Despise with all my heart.

Why is a kid buying his mom SHOES anyway? "I want her to look beautiful if mama meets Jesus tonight." I would hope The Big J isn't so shallow as to fret over whether his newest arrival to Heaven is wearing the right pumps or not.

[ladynorbert.livejournal.com]

I think the implication is that his mother really wanted those particular shoes, or they're so poor that she never had a nice pair of shoes, or something like that. Maybe it's just one of those "it's the thought that counts" things. It's still really irksome.

[aireal.livejournal.com]

I HATE that "Christmas Shoes" song with a passion too... and change the station immediately.

I also hate the one where they x-couple meet and have a romantic bottle of wine in the car while reminiscing and then they leave each other.... FIRST OF ALL, WHY PLAY IT ONLY AT CHRISTMAS, (I suppose I shouldn't look a gift-horse in the mouth)... but 2nd - HELLOOOOO depressing anyone????